I want to start this off by stating the fact that I realize my son is two. I realize that things are new, and different, and he may not fully comprehend what's always going on, however he is extremely intelligent. He is fully aware of his surroundings at all times and unless he's tired, he has a good idea of what he wants to do and play with, etc. Now that I've got that bit out of the way, I feel that I can continue with the rest of my post. I want memories. I don't have a lot of pictures of AJ doing things that other kids do at his age, or the ages he has already passed. Let me explain. We have no pictures of him with Santa because he doesn't do well with lines and even if he did, AJ would freak out when it was his turn to sit on Santa's lap. We have one picture of him with the Easter Bunny (from last year) and that's only because I was sitting next to EB, holding AJ while he was screaming his head off. I have some pictures of him in his baby pool when he was 6 months old and he was crying; I have no pictures of him from last year because for the limited time he was in our neighbor's pool, he refused to sit down -- he just stood and walked around in the water, playing with random toys.
Today, we attempted to play in the snow. It took me 30 minutes to get him dressed because we couldn't find matching boots, etc. By the time we got outside, we stayed out for maybe all of 20 minutes, and AJ cried almost the whole time. Again, no pictures and no video.
Did I mention nobody bothered to come to his first birthday party? That really bothered me. The second birthday party was a blast and he had SO MUCH FUN!!! People came, and it was great! But I digress....
The post is supposed to be about making memories, and what I want for AJ. It bothers me that when AJ gets older and starts asking about (or for) photos of himself when he is younger, that I more than likely won't have what he is looking for, or to see. I don't know how I'm going to explain to him why we don't have them, without making him feel bad. I NEVER want to make my child feel bad about himself. It is my hope that the therapy he receives this year will enable him to be able to sit near the Easter Bunny (or in my lap next to EB) without flipping out. I would love to be able to have a picture of him with Santa. I want him to be able to enjoy the water like his friends do, without being scared of it. I want him to be able to play in the snow and not be terrified of how it feels on his body, or how the cold feels on his face. I want him to be able to finger paint and be expressive and artistic...unlike now where he flips out at the mere thought of finger painting...
I suppose what I'm really trying to say is that I want AJ to be able to enjoy being a child while he's still a child. I realize he's two, but it seems like I brought him home from the hospital just a few months ago.
It breaks my heart in two when I see him scared of things that other kids are not. Like baby dolls, Stuffed animals, Mr. Potato Head, water, and snow (to name a few).
I just pray that we can get AJ the help and resources he needs through Early Intervention so that he is able to live a productive life and not have any major behavioral issues in the future. Most of all, I hope that they are able to help him before he gets kicked out of daycare for biting and shoving his classmates. That too is part of his disorder and both his teachers and I don't know how to get him to stop.
It's just extremely frustrating and heartbreaking when you have confirmed that something is wrong, but you have to wait for an undetermined amount of time to get started on a course of action.
Hopefully we don't have to wait too long.
Saturday, January 21, 2012
Friday, January 20, 2012
Where do we go from here?
Just to give you a little information, I have been going back to school for almost a year now. I have recently begun my English II class, and she has suggested that we journal every day. Since I have this blog, I thought "I'll just write a post about what is on my mind, every day." I really should be doing that anyway -- and I haven't, so I apologize profusely.
So the title of this post is "Where do we go from here?" Which is a pretty vague question in and of itself if you don't know the meaning behind it. Yesterday, my precious son of barely 2 years old was diagnosed with Sensory Issues, better known as Sensory Processing Disorder (SPD). The Occupational Therapists that came over to evaluate him yesterday were wonderful, yet vague in the severity of his issues. Apparently, he is not "OH MY GOD!!!" horrible, but his quirks are enough of a red flag that he qualifies for services. Fortunately all Early Intervention services in Pennsylvania are covered, so we do not have to pay a dime. Which is great, because I really don't have a dime to spare.
With that in mind, we come full circle to the title of this post: where do we go from here? As she was leaving, our services coordinator stated that we'd get a copy of the report that they typed up when they were there, and that she'd call us to set up a planning meeting once she got ahold of the agency that we decided to go with. And that was it.
Have I ever mentioned that I hate waiting?
Have I ever mentioned that I hate not knowing what's going on?
Well I do. And it's killing me.
However I am a strong individual -- at least that's what everyone keeps telling me, and I know that everything happens for a reason. so I will be patient, and love on my son just as much as I always have. I will give him all of the attention that he requires and then some. For I do not want him to think that this diagnosis has changed his life ONE IOTA. Because it hasn't. To me, he will always be the sweet, compassionate, intelligent, funny, amazing child that he has always been. Because I love him to the moon and back and no matter what happens, I will always be his champion.
So the title of this post is "Where do we go from here?" Which is a pretty vague question in and of itself if you don't know the meaning behind it. Yesterday, my precious son of barely 2 years old was diagnosed with Sensory Issues, better known as Sensory Processing Disorder (SPD). The Occupational Therapists that came over to evaluate him yesterday were wonderful, yet vague in the severity of his issues. Apparently, he is not "OH MY GOD!!!" horrible, but his quirks are enough of a red flag that he qualifies for services. Fortunately all Early Intervention services in Pennsylvania are covered, so we do not have to pay a dime. Which is great, because I really don't have a dime to spare.
With that in mind, we come full circle to the title of this post: where do we go from here? As she was leaving, our services coordinator stated that we'd get a copy of the report that they typed up when they were there, and that she'd call us to set up a planning meeting once she got ahold of the agency that we decided to go with. And that was it.
Have I ever mentioned that I hate waiting?
Have I ever mentioned that I hate not knowing what's going on?
Well I do. And it's killing me.
Wednesday, January 18, 2012
Monday, June 6, 2011
What to do
In this current economy, in our current state of affairs, it seems everyone is tightening their belts in some way. The question is, how do you tighten your belt when there's nothing left to tighten? I've been going through my budget recently, listing my expenses and going through everything. My cell phone? Cheapest package. Do I need it? Yes because it's still cheaper than a land line (which I got rid of). I suppose we really don't need our Satellite dish, but we have a little one and while TV is NOT a babysitter, he does enjoy watching the programs offered on Sprout. Unfortunately, Sprout is not available on the most basic DirecTV package. I am going to be more strict about the air conditioning/window situation. Windows open after dark and if the AC is on during the day, it will be set to the mid-seventies. We work in the basement anyway so it's usually cooler than what the thermostat says on the main floor.
We have a home warranty that we're paying $41 a month for. I think I've used it all of three times since I moved in back in 2007, but I'm afraid that once I cancel it, I'll be hit with a huge repair fee. Of course, I could just save the money in an account and apply it to a repair bill if and when it happens. $500 a year is a nice chunk of change and really too much to just throw away. Plus, it's another $50 each time I have to call them. If I'm paying you $500 a year, why do I have a $50 deductible also?
Once AJ is potty-trained, the diapers expense will go away, and we'll be able to get him into a traditional pre-school. Don't get me wrong, I love where he is but they don't have any rate differential for daycare and pre-school. However that may still be a deal, as I don't know how long pre-school is typically supposed to last and if he'll need to go back to day care when it's done.
As a part-time student (full time WAHM), I can't get a second job because my plate is full as it is. However I'm open to any suggestions anyone has. I'm not looking for miracles....I'd just like it to not feel so tight each month.
We have a home warranty that we're paying $41 a month for. I think I've used it all of three times since I moved in back in 2007, but I'm afraid that once I cancel it, I'll be hit with a huge repair fee. Of course, I could just save the money in an account and apply it to a repair bill if and when it happens. $500 a year is a nice chunk of change and really too much to just throw away. Plus, it's another $50 each time I have to call them. If I'm paying you $500 a year, why do I have a $50 deductible also?
Once AJ is potty-trained, the diapers expense will go away, and we'll be able to get him into a traditional pre-school. Don't get me wrong, I love where he is but they don't have any rate differential for daycare and pre-school. However that may still be a deal, as I don't know how long pre-school is typically supposed to last and if he'll need to go back to day care when it's done.
As a part-time student (full time WAHM), I can't get a second job because my plate is full as it is. However I'm open to any suggestions anyone has. I'm not looking for miracles....I'd just like it to not feel so tight each month.
Wednesday, January 26, 2011
For the kids
Hello! I know no one reads this anyway, so it's more theraputic than anything. It's been a long time since I've posted anything here and I felt that I needed to get back to writing. I'm going to put up some pictures of me and AJ so you can see what we look like. Perhaps that will help attract readers. Perhaps it won't because I'm just boring. Ce' la vie. So....what's happened since I was here last...TONS.
My amazing, wonderful, smart, protective, caring Great Aunt/Grandmother Eleanora Piekielniak passed away at the end of October, 2010. I will miss you horribly but I am SO glad that you got to meet AJ.
AJ had his first birthday (Yay!)
AJ started walking (sob!)
Frank & I started working from home (DOUBLE YAY!!!) and I LOVE it!! Seriously....you couldn't pay me enough to go back into the office, and I think if they tried to threaten me with that, I might quit and try to find something around here. I'm serious....I never want to work downtown ever again. Unless I'm making at least twice my salary, because the difference is all going to go for parking. Unfortunately, the catch with working at home means that I can do more overtime, because I log out and I'm already home. I'm afraid I'm turning into a workaholic...except I need to be right now because we have $7,000 worth of appliances that need to be replaced this year. But that's another story for another day.
I am dabbling more with cooking. Yes, I use recipies, but I try to make them my own. I figured that I'm a mommy now, so I need to learn how to bake and whatnot. I make a mean banana bread as well as a mean pumpkin bread. I attempted to make pumpkin & cream cheese muffins last night. I think they came out all right, but I was *just* short on the vanilla extract and white sugar, and I think I can tell. The boys can't though....Frank ate two last night & AJ shoved an entire mini-muffin in his mouth this morning, so that's all that counts. LOL :)
Last but not least, my new years resolution. Most people pick the whole "lose weight, quit drinking, quit smoking" route. I, on the other hand, am not. Yes, I am still fat from having AJ. We'll get there. I do not drink much (my tolerance has gone to pot in the last couple years) and I quit smoking when I found out I was pregnant (2 years this May!), so my resolution is to go back to school. I have been accepted to the local community college and I MUST speak with an advisor soon so that I can get funding, etc for the fall. It'll be nice, as I'm considered a single mom so I'll qualify for grants (Frank & I aren't married, so as far as the Feds are concerned, I'm a single mom. I don't make the rules, I just roll with 'em). My dream is to be a pediatric nurse. I'm a crabby Cancer and I'm a motherly type of person. I want to take care of people and make sure they feel needed, wanted, and loved, If I had a 5 bedroom house, three of the bedrooms would be filled with foster kids. I LOVE KIDS. To me there's no better way to spend your day than around kids. Yes, I understand they are sick and some won't make it. I also understand that you're not supposed to let yourself get emotionally attached. That doesn't mean that they don't deserve to know someone cares.
When I was a senior in high school, we had to do 40 hours of community service. I chose to volunteer at the local hospital. My absolute favorite place to be was the pediatric ward. I loved reading bedtime stories to the little kids and playing cards or board games with the older ones. One thing people don't realize is that these kids' parents don't regularly visit them. If I had a child in the hospital for an extended period of time, I'd live there. Seriously, I would. But these parents are absent. The kids live for visitors and just to know that someone cares. THAT is why I want to be a peds nurse. Not for the money and *certainly* not for the schedule. I want to be a peds nurse for the kids. So that they know someone is there for them and someone cares.
My amazing, wonderful, smart, protective, caring Great Aunt/Grandmother Eleanora Piekielniak passed away at the end of October, 2010. I will miss you horribly but I am SO glad that you got to meet AJ.
AJ had his first birthday (Yay!)
AJ started walking (sob!)
Frank & I started working from home (DOUBLE YAY!!!) and I LOVE it!! Seriously....you couldn't pay me enough to go back into the office, and I think if they tried to threaten me with that, I might quit and try to find something around here. I'm serious....I never want to work downtown ever again. Unless I'm making at least twice my salary, because the difference is all going to go for parking. Unfortunately, the catch with working at home means that I can do more overtime, because I log out and I'm already home. I'm afraid I'm turning into a workaholic...except I need to be right now because we have $7,000 worth of appliances that need to be replaced this year. But that's another story for another day.
I am dabbling more with cooking. Yes, I use recipies, but I try to make them my own. I figured that I'm a mommy now, so I need to learn how to bake and whatnot. I make a mean banana bread as well as a mean pumpkin bread. I attempted to make pumpkin & cream cheese muffins last night. I think they came out all right, but I was *just* short on the vanilla extract and white sugar, and I think I can tell. The boys can't though....Frank ate two last night & AJ shoved an entire mini-muffin in his mouth this morning, so that's all that counts. LOL :)
Last but not least, my new years resolution. Most people pick the whole "lose weight, quit drinking, quit smoking" route. I, on the other hand, am not. Yes, I am still fat from having AJ. We'll get there. I do not drink much (my tolerance has gone to pot in the last couple years) and I quit smoking when I found out I was pregnant (2 years this May!), so my resolution is to go back to school. I have been accepted to the local community college and I MUST speak with an advisor soon so that I can get funding, etc for the fall. It'll be nice, as I'm considered a single mom so I'll qualify for grants (Frank & I aren't married, so as far as the Feds are concerned, I'm a single mom. I don't make the rules, I just roll with 'em). My dream is to be a pediatric nurse. I'm a crabby Cancer and I'm a motherly type of person. I want to take care of people and make sure they feel needed, wanted, and loved, If I had a 5 bedroom house, three of the bedrooms would be filled with foster kids. I LOVE KIDS. To me there's no better way to spend your day than around kids. Yes, I understand they are sick and some won't make it. I also understand that you're not supposed to let yourself get emotionally attached. That doesn't mean that they don't deserve to know someone cares.
When I was a senior in high school, we had to do 40 hours of community service. I chose to volunteer at the local hospital. My absolute favorite place to be was the pediatric ward. I loved reading bedtime stories to the little kids and playing cards or board games with the older ones. One thing people don't realize is that these kids' parents don't regularly visit them. If I had a child in the hospital for an extended period of time, I'd live there. Seriously, I would. But these parents are absent. The kids live for visitors and just to know that someone cares. THAT is why I want to be a peds nurse. Not for the money and *certainly* not for the schedule. I want to be a peds nurse for the kids. So that they know someone is there for them and someone cares.
Saturday, October 23, 2010
Two months have gone by and so much has happened.
Hello Friends. I apologize that it's been so long since I've spoken to you all. So much has happened.
First, my Aunt Eleanora is still with us. Praise God. However her husband, George Gilbert has passed on. I would like to hope he is with God, however I do not know. I pray for the repose of his soul. Even though it's been a month since he passed, I still pray for him.
Second, I have come to realize how incredibly blessed I am to have my son Aaron. Through tangled interwebs, I have come across other mothers who have been incredibly blessed to have their children for a few years, weeks, and in one case, days. It makes me incredibly sad to read those stories, yet it makes me want to hold Aaron just a little bit tighter. I'm honestly contemplating going and waking him up so I can hold him. Although that may be selfish and I may just wait until the morning.
Third, I think this is all stemming from the fact that for the past month (and the next month) I am working 6 day weeks. I am trying to save up money so that we can go visit my parents in South Carolina for Thanksgiving. Additionally, Aaron will get to meet his Great Grandparents for the first time. They are soooo excited and I am trying my hardest to make it work. In case you all didn't know or weren't aware, we have to rent a car each time we travel out of state, due to the enormous quantity of crap that needs to be brought with us. We are definitely bringing:
--the Pack 'n' Play
--his chair (he needs somewhere to sit)
--our suitcases
--his stroller (large travel-system style)
I am contemplating bringing:
--his exersaucer
--the booster part of his highchair
Hear me out...we're leaving Wednesday afternoon, stopping overnight in Beckley WV (halfway) and then continuing on to Greenville, SC the next day. We'll be gone half of Wednesday, thursday, friday, saturday, and sunday. We'll be eating thanksgiving dinner and he needs somewhere to sit (Highchair). Additionally, we'll be gone for 3 - 4 WHOLE. DAYS. The kid is going to need some sort of stimulation (exersaucer). The problem is, I don't know if it's all going to fit. Or if it's even necessary. Comments and Suggestions are gratefully appreciated.
Fourth, I just found out our babysitter can no longer watch Aaron. She is pregnant again and her doctor has advised that she no longer babysit due to potential stress on the unborn child. She told me this last monday. I have nowhere else to put him and no one who can watch him. This has caused quite a predicament. Fortunately, Frank's parents can watch him during the month of November. If they couldn't, I don't know what I would do as I am working every possible hour of overtime that I can just to go to South Carolina and I cannot possibly afford an additional $130 a month for Daycare at this point in time. Oh and...
I DO NOT WANT TO PUT HIM BACK IN CENTER BASED CARE!!! The last time we had him in center based care, he ended up having a diaper rash SO BAD that his poor little skin was cracked and bleeding. Our Pediatrician made us pull him out. I am extremely leery of putting him into another Day Care. However I may have to swallow my pride. If I could only get my debt paid off (about 5k), I could take a pay cut and possibly work part time. Such is a dream but probably not reality.
Oh well...
So that's what's been going on with me. What's up with you? Leave a comment.
First, my Aunt Eleanora is still with us. Praise God. However her husband, George Gilbert has passed on. I would like to hope he is with God, however I do not know. I pray for the repose of his soul. Even though it's been a month since he passed, I still pray for him.
Second, I have come to realize how incredibly blessed I am to have my son Aaron. Through tangled interwebs, I have come across other mothers who have been incredibly blessed to have their children for a few years, weeks, and in one case, days. It makes me incredibly sad to read those stories, yet it makes me want to hold Aaron just a little bit tighter. I'm honestly contemplating going and waking him up so I can hold him. Although that may be selfish and I may just wait until the morning.
Third, I think this is all stemming from the fact that for the past month (and the next month) I am working 6 day weeks. I am trying to save up money so that we can go visit my parents in South Carolina for Thanksgiving. Additionally, Aaron will get to meet his Great Grandparents for the first time. They are soooo excited and I am trying my hardest to make it work. In case you all didn't know or weren't aware, we have to rent a car each time we travel out of state, due to the enormous quantity of crap that needs to be brought with us. We are definitely bringing:
--the Pack 'n' Play
--his chair (he needs somewhere to sit)
--our suitcases
--his stroller (large travel-system style)
I am contemplating bringing:
--his exersaucer
--the booster part of his highchair
Hear me out...we're leaving Wednesday afternoon, stopping overnight in Beckley WV (halfway) and then continuing on to Greenville, SC the next day. We'll be gone half of Wednesday, thursday, friday, saturday, and sunday. We'll be eating thanksgiving dinner and he needs somewhere to sit (Highchair). Additionally, we'll be gone for 3 - 4 WHOLE. DAYS. The kid is going to need some sort of stimulation (exersaucer). The problem is, I don't know if it's all going to fit. Or if it's even necessary. Comments and Suggestions are gratefully appreciated.
Fourth, I just found out our babysitter can no longer watch Aaron. She is pregnant again and her doctor has advised that she no longer babysit due to potential stress on the unborn child. She told me this last monday. I have nowhere else to put him and no one who can watch him. This has caused quite a predicament. Fortunately, Frank's parents can watch him during the month of November. If they couldn't, I don't know what I would do as I am working every possible hour of overtime that I can just to go to South Carolina and I cannot possibly afford an additional $130 a month for Daycare at this point in time. Oh and...
I DO NOT WANT TO PUT HIM BACK IN CENTER BASED CARE!!! The last time we had him in center based care, he ended up having a diaper rash SO BAD that his poor little skin was cracked and bleeding. Our Pediatrician made us pull him out. I am extremely leery of putting him into another Day Care. However I may have to swallow my pride. If I could only get my debt paid off (about 5k), I could take a pay cut and possibly work part time. Such is a dream but probably not reality.
Oh well...
So that's what's been going on with me. What's up with you? Leave a comment.
Sunday, August 15, 2010
A Quick Thought
Today's post is going to be rather short and without much thought. I apologize as there has been a family emergency, and I am in the midst of laundry & packing so we can leave tomorrow morning.
Today at Service, we spoke about Christ's Followers (Sheep) and His fans (Goats).
This led me to remember the song by Cake -- Sheep go to Heaven (Goats go to Hell). The lyrics are below:
I’m not feeling alright today
I’m not feeling that great
I’m not catching on fire today
love has started to fade
I’m not going to smile today
I’m not gonna laugh
you're out living it up today
I’ve got dues to pay
And the grave-digger puts on the forceps
The stone mason does all the work
The barber can give you a haircut
The carpenter can take you out to lunch
I just want to play on my pan-pipes
I just want to drink me some wine
as soon as you're born you start dying
so you might as well have a good time
Sheep go to heaven
Goats go to hell
Sheep go to heaven
Goats… go to hell
I don't wanna go to sunset strip
I don't wanna feel the emptiness
bold marquees with stupid band names
I don't wanna go to sunset strip
I don't wanna go to sunset strip
I don't wanna feel the emptiness
Bold marquees with stupid band names
I don't wanna go to sunset strip
And the grave-digger puts on the forceps
The stone mason does all the work
The barber can give you a haircut
The carpenter can take you out to lunch
I just want to play on my pan-pipes
I just want to drink me some wine
As soon as you're born you start dying
So you might as well have a good time
Sheep go to heaven
Goats go to hell
Sheep go to heaven
Goats… go to hell
And the grave-digger puts on the forceps
The stone mason does all the work
The barber can give you a haircut
The carpenter can take you out to lunch
I just want to play on my pan-pipes
I just want to drink me some wine
As soon as you're born you start dying
So you might as well have a good time
Sheep go to heaven
Goats go to hell
Sheep go to heaven
Goats… go to hell
So the question is.....are you a Sheep, or are you a Goat?
Today at Service, we spoke about Christ's Followers (Sheep) and His fans (Goats).
This led me to remember the song by Cake -- Sheep go to Heaven (Goats go to Hell). The lyrics are below:
I’m not feeling alright today
I’m not feeling that great
I’m not catching on fire today
love has started to fade
I’m not going to smile today
I’m not gonna laugh
you're out living it up today
I’ve got dues to pay
And the grave-digger puts on the forceps
The stone mason does all the work
The barber can give you a haircut
The carpenter can take you out to lunch
I just want to play on my pan-pipes
I just want to drink me some wine
as soon as you're born you start dying
so you might as well have a good time
Sheep go to heaven
Goats go to hell
Sheep go to heaven
Goats… go to hell
I don't wanna go to sunset strip
I don't wanna feel the emptiness
bold marquees with stupid band names
I don't wanna go to sunset strip
I don't wanna go to sunset strip
I don't wanna feel the emptiness
Bold marquees with stupid band names
I don't wanna go to sunset strip
And the grave-digger puts on the forceps
The stone mason does all the work
The barber can give you a haircut
The carpenter can take you out to lunch
I just want to play on my pan-pipes
I just want to drink me some wine
As soon as you're born you start dying
So you might as well have a good time
Sheep go to heaven
Goats go to hell
Sheep go to heaven
Goats… go to hell
And the grave-digger puts on the forceps
The stone mason does all the work
The barber can give you a haircut
The carpenter can take you out to lunch
I just want to play on my pan-pipes
I just want to drink me some wine
As soon as you're born you start dying
So you might as well have a good time
Sheep go to heaven
Goats go to hell
Sheep go to heaven
Goats… go to hell
So the question is.....are you a Sheep, or are you a Goat?
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